Saturday, March 14, 2009

Liberated

Things have been so crazy here with work that I haven't been able to even post Grace's 5 month update. I was going to do it last weekend and Jason said "Just wait for 6 months now". Maybe I'll just do a mixed post for Thursday (Grace's 6 month B-day). Well a few weeks ago I was trying to nurse Grace and she just kept screaming and pulling away from me. I thought that maybe her mouth was sore from teething, but it just kept happening at every feeding. She was also waking up at least two times a night and then I ended up getting sick yet again. Jason and I talked it over and we decided to start supplementing with formula :( She has actually been doing really well on the formula. Well lately I have had to bring home work every night and on the weekends. I feel so guilty because at night I get home from work between 5:45 and 6 then I change, eat and feed Grace and then it's time to do work. Meanwhile, Jason holds Grace and most of the time she just sits and looks at me and cries. Needless to say this was causing a lot of heartbreak for me. I have also felt really bad because my mom has been helping out so much with all of the housework, cooking, and cleaning. I can't even tell you when the last time I cooked or cleaned. Jason and I talked it over and we realized that it really wasn't that important for me to work at this job. We figured out our finances and decided that it will be better for me to just go back to substituting and possible get another summer job. So yesterday I put in my two weeks notice and it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I cannot even explain this feeling to you. I really don't know how working moms do it. I will still be working obviously, but it will really be like working part time I think because I will have half of the work. So with this new venture I am hoping to be able to go back to breastfeeding exclusively with solid foods obviously.

2 comments:

Kirsten said...

Glad to hear that you are able to make it work and will feel much better being at home more often. I agree with you - I don't know how working moms do it!!

Keith and I are planning on having me stay home (not work full time) at least for a little while. I think I will have to go back to work part-time eventually, but I feel a sense of relief knowing that I will be able to be at home with the baby, for the most part.

I hope things continue to go well with you guys. I can't believe she is almost 6 months old!! Time sure flies!!!

Brian and Karen said...

I am so glad to hear that you were able to figure things out and cut back your hours. You will feel so rewarded in the long run. Every one has to make their own choice, but I think you will be happy with this decision looking back on it. :)

I hope the nursing gets back on track for you. We finally (at 10 months) started supplementing with formula, mostly when I am in the classroom. I think Sierra has had 3 formula bottles so far. She tolerates them, which is good. But nothing beats mama's milk! We finally ran out of milk in the freezer. :(

Blessings and prayers to you in your new endeavors. You know, if you ever wanted to move South, as a sub in VA Beach, you could work EVERY DAY if you wanted to. :) They are desperate for subs.

Lots of love. :)